On-and-off suicidal, then content and with a bright-outlook on life?

I suffer from depression too and I've never thought of suicide, but my older cousin commited suicide last year, so I know how hard it is losig someone like that. I would suggest trying to find another therapist, one who you feel comfortable with and who gets you. You can also ask your parents to help, if you feel comfortable talking about that with them. Sorry I couldn't really help. I hope everything works out.